Wow, so much has happened since I last blogged. I got pregnant, had a baby, my bigger baby started school, my hubby has been pursuing his masters...its been uber busy but I have loved so much about this part of my life even though I have been exhausted through a lot of it but its a good kind.

I can not chronologically update everything thats been going on so I figured I can just start with today. Like I said I am quite happy with my life but I know I could be happier....and this is not me being ungrateful because Lord knows how graceful, generous and good he has been to me. Just certain things weighing me down. My crosses.

My mother had a stroke in April and that has left me quite anxious, and nervous and just sad that I am not closer to her. In all honesty, I ask myself how much longer she will be with us and I cry like a little baby when I imagine she may never see her new grandbaby. But even there, there have been miracles at play that are most certain worth praising our Lord for. The stroke did not affect her mobility at all and she has made great strides in her speech in the last four or so months since her stroke. She says so much more now when I talk to her on the phone. But today when I called she said she can barely see. I sent some pictures of all of us and it made me sad to hear she could barely see us. That made me sad. Thats my mom, dad and my son Chilu in the middle in Zambia, October of 2011.

My prayer is that God please heal my mother, take care of her and I hope to see her, hug her, talk to her in person. I love you mommy.

Happy New Year!!

Wow, time is flying. I feel like I am getting old. Some days I ask myself what I am doing with my life then I am like really? I have a husband and two beautiful kids that keep me busy. That should keep me happy.
Above anything else...I am grateful for my life. Grateful for my blessings. Sometimes though...I ask myself if there is more to me as a person.
This year I have a couple of resolutions...go figure! Because of that nagging thought that comes back every once in a while I have decided that, instead of letting all these unknown questions boggle me and start making me question the good life I have, I am going to dedicate my year to just listening to God speak to me. Because maybe there is more to my life, or maybe there isn't. Maybe God wants me to find out today, maybe He doesnt. The point is, I am going to try not to dwell on it on my own tiny human understanding.
So thats my first resolution.
 My second one is my marriage. I want to seriously rededicate my union to my husband to God. I feel like we may be going through the motions but not really being the sacred union we were designed to be. My husband will be away for some time and while he is away I am dedicating a fast for our marriage. I havent quite ironed out the kinks of my fast but I was thinking of giving up meat except fish Monday through Friday, or just having breakfast then fluids till supper time. Anyone who knows me will know food is my weakness so this will truly require the grace of God!
Thirdly I would really like to be healthier and leaner this year. I will end there coz thats a whole other blog.
Finally, I would love to be keep learning from God and the people He sent to me how to be a better mom, wife, sister, daughter, friend and disciple.
I am optimistic about this year. But perhaps this year in a more quiet and humble way. 2012 was wonderful but I also learnt that I don't have control over everything.

Happy new year:)